In honor of V-day and all the LOVE (flowers, Hallmark cards, chocolates, crafts, cookies) that we splurge onto others, I wanted to remind you about YOU. Self-love. Not the Kanye narcissistic (media motivated) self-love. But TRUE SELF LOVE & SELF- COMPASSION.
Today's modern world (and especially our western culture) values success as an "I CAN DO IT ALL" over-achieving lifestyle. And that's a double-edged sword. On one hand, you want to think you CAN do X- to keep you motivated on your venture- but on the other hand- you may not be able to do it ALL and many times end up "beating yourself up" for not being able to do so.
Let me tell you a little story…
Growing up in Puerto Rico in a very traditional environment, success was defined as good grades, following the rules, and diplomas hanging on the walls. Well, I was NOT a traditional child. I did do it all (except maybe for following the rules ; ). Got good grades, got my college diploma, passed my CPA, but I NEVER felt “successful”. Then came motherhood- sleep deprived days, studying nutrition between naps, and not having a CLUE about parenting…. and yikes! self-criticism went up the roof!
I went saw a therapist for a while (coaching is important!) and she helped me understand that success is whatever feels like success to YOU. You don’t have to be a "do it all" to be successful. In fact… is there such a thing?
So I defined SUCCESS for ME as...
As a health coach I’ve realized many people struggle with self-compassion in the area of health. There is fear, guilt, and shame if you don’t achieve that “weight loss goal”, “exercise 5 times a week”, "follow the diet plan exactly" or "eat ALL organic foods" as you have read or have been told you should. And sometimes that FEAR stops you from taking that first step and doing something for yourself. As I always say: its about PROGRESS not PERFECTION.
This Valentine's define YOUR SUCCESS! What would be a successful, happy life to you? What's a step you can take towards better health?
And REMEMBER: Do your BEST, and if you don’t….
Today's modern world (and especially our western culture) values success as an "I CAN DO IT ALL" over-achieving lifestyle. And that's a double-edged sword. On one hand, you want to think you CAN do X- to keep you motivated on your venture- but on the other hand- you may not be able to do it ALL and many times end up "beating yourself up" for not being able to do so.
Let me tell you a little story…
Growing up in Puerto Rico in a very traditional environment, success was defined as good grades, following the rules, and diplomas hanging on the walls. Well, I was NOT a traditional child. I did do it all (except maybe for following the rules ; ). Got good grades, got my college diploma, passed my CPA, but I NEVER felt “successful”. Then came motherhood- sleep deprived days, studying nutrition between naps, and not having a CLUE about parenting…. and yikes! self-criticism went up the roof!
I went saw a therapist for a while (coaching is important!) and she helped me understand that success is whatever feels like success to YOU. You don’t have to be a "do it all" to be successful. In fact… is there such a thing?
So I defined SUCCESS for ME as...
- Being the best wife and mother I can be, and when I’m not... apologizing to them, and forgiving myself.
- Being the best at what I do, and when I make a mistake... learn from it and move on. Next time I’ll try something new.
- Being healthy- cooking as many of our meals as I can, meditating, exercising and being out in nature-, and when I don’t... move on and try again tomorrow.
- Being grateful, optimistic, and caring, and when I’m not... be aware of it, acknowledge it and know the feeling will pass.
- Having a healthy work/life balance, and when I get overwhelmed... take a step back, ask for help, and remember my priorities.
As a health coach I’ve realized many people struggle with self-compassion in the area of health. There is fear, guilt, and shame if you don’t achieve that “weight loss goal”, “exercise 5 times a week”, "follow the diet plan exactly" or "eat ALL organic foods" as you have read or have been told you should. And sometimes that FEAR stops you from taking that first step and doing something for yourself. As I always say: its about PROGRESS not PERFECTION.
This Valentine's define YOUR SUCCESS! What would be a successful, happy life to you? What's a step you can take towards better health?
And REMEMBER: Do your BEST, and if you don’t….
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